Discussion · Personal

My Absence From Blogging, Chronic Pain and Other Updates

Hi everybody, it’s Karen and I have a migraine. unlike most other times I have a medication that usually makes it so that I don’t have one. This is only my second migraine in a week since I started my new medication. I used to have migraines 3-4 times a day. They would blind me to sights, sounds, and make me physically ill.

The following blog post depicts my personal experience with chronic pain, you may not experience the same symptoms. Speak to your own doctor about pain management, and don’t let another person tell you how you’re feeling if you’re in pain.

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I depended on Excedrin migraine, which I recently figured out I was overdosing on. I would take four pills 3-4 times a day when the bottle said to only take two pills in a 12 hour period. whoops.

For awhile now I’ve been re-experiencing pseudo-seizures. These are seizures brought on by stress. Mine were brought on by stress and migraines. I’ve had two big trips to the hospital in the last two months, and the first one resulted in me being hauled off in an ambulance.

After the first time I saw a registered nurse. She was extremely concerned with my symptoms (numbness, tingling, loss of vision, seizing) and referred me to a neurologist and put me on a medication temporarily. This was back in September. I had to apply for medical insurance for poor people cuz I’m a poor people and I missed enrollment for my employer last year. Which is partially why I’ve been avoiding the doctor to begin with.

Just seeing the doctor is roughly $79, an emergency room visit is roughly $2,995 and an ambulance is over $700 just in case you needed to know. My new medication? If it weren’t covered by my insurance is $35 a bottle.

Finances aside, I partially didn’t want to go to the doctor because when I lived with my godparents my aunt (godmother) convinced me that my pain was all in my head and that I was addicted to the pain meds I was using.

Let me give you a small glimpse into how that came about. I have had severe, crippling menstrual cramps from the time I can remember starting my period. However, because of past medical issues, I cannot use birth control to manage my cramps, so I started off with Tylenol, went up to Midol, and then up to the maximum strength Pamprin. There were times where I might miss a dose by accident and end up on the bathroom floor crying. My uncle found me like that once and went to the store to get me meds.

So with that explanation out of the way, one day I was in a lot of pain, so I asked my aunt to give me some Pamprin. She gave me some. I started to feel better. Then she goes “I didn’t actually give you Pamprin, I gave you regular Tylenol. See? It’s all in your head.” She began to convince me that I was overreacting. So I began to stop taking pain meds, and just tough it out.

So when my pain meds didn’t work up until recently, I would have to either call in to work, or go in sick and maybe go home early.

My mother has been trying to get me to see a doctor for migraines for years. This past winter I got locked in the central park gazebo because the bus drivers don’t check to see if people are in there (for real, that month they had ended up locking four people in there) and I was unfortunate enough to get locked in, with a migraine, physically ill. So after calling my mother, the police, getting out, I had to go to the emergency room and get a shot for pain.

There’s no further damage from when I was a kid (thank goodness) not that that answers any questions. But when he gave me the Xanax I was hit with a dilemma: tell him I’m fine or tell him no? I didn’t want him to think I was coming here for drugs (which, by the pamphlet he gave me clearly he did) so I said I was fine. I wasn’t. The Xanax didn’t stop the seizing, it just made me tired.

I went to a neurologist recently and she did some physical tests and changed my meds to something stronger (once I take it it kicks my ass and knocks me out within 30 minutes but the effects last pretty much all day the next day), and it’s nice to have someone not think I’m crazy or trying to get drugs. I could’ve cried guys. I had another test and I have one more coming up, and then I have an appointment again in a few months so I’m hopeful.

So that’s what has happened recently with that. Now that my migraines are under control, I think I’ll start using Pamprin again. Now that there’s not people telling me that my pain isn’t real (or anyone significant enough for me to care).

That’s the biggest reason I haven’t been blogging, and I’m really sorry about that. However, something that I’ve picked up aside from blogging is reviewing products like snack boxes, beauty boxes and doing album/product unboxings. That being said, I film with my phone and my phone likes to hold my videos hostage so for the past few days I’ve had to upload about 7 videos to Facebook so I can download them to my computer so I can edit them so I can upload them to YouTube.

It’s a pain in the ass, but I feel accomplished. I’ve noticed that my viewers (I don’t know if y’all, my readers watch my videos) seem to like my Japanese album unboxings so I might try to do more of those in the future. I also probably need to get an actual camera to do that with. Maybe a better tripod too.

I have been doing my radio show, What the Bop?! every Tuesday somewhere between 6-7 pm CST but from now on it will be at 7 pm CST. I’ll be making the timing a priority, but it has to be later because I had to switch my days off. I’m really happy with my show. Sometimes it’s quiet, but I’m still new to it and if you guys wanna check it out, I have a page where I’ve embedded a player for y’all to listen to it if you’d like. You can make requests if you want, email me, message me on Tumblr, Facebook, message the Hi:Asia Facebook page, message the Hi:Asia radio Facebook page, any way works.

Other than that I’ve been working as usual. I still have a full time job, sometimes I don’t fall asleep shortly after work and I watch anime (Restaurant to Another World has ended, but The Ancient Magus’ Bride recently started) and dramas (While You Were Sleeping, finally over Post Drama Depression from Goblin).

Another thing that’s been taking up my time is that I run Hi:Asia’s Tumblr. I haven’t this week recently because of my medical issues, but usually I have been. I do music video updates mostly but sometimes I take to Twitter and fill some time slots with posts from Twitter Japan.

Thanks for being so understanding. Ya’ll are quiet anyway, but you’re also so nice. I appreciate all of you. Thank you.

-Karen

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